[csail-related] GSB Tonight: "They"

[jamoozy at gmail.com (Andrew Sabisch)]

A doctor [1] asked me the other day, "What's the first question you ask
when someone exclaims 'I'm a parent [2]!'?"

I thought about it for all of 2ms, and said "Boy or girl?"

"Right!" Said the doctor [3].  "Isn't that odd?"

I couldn't think why, so I asked.  The response I got was this [4]: "A lot
of things can go wrong during childbirth.  Before modern medicine, lots of
mothers and children died during labor.  It's a sad fact that in less
technologically advance (or resource-hungry) parts of the world, they
frequently still do.  The first question should be, 'Great!  Everything
went okay?  Mom and baby are both happy and healthy?'" [5]

I thought about this.  Let's set aside the fact that things generally *do*
go well, and that may be why we first ask the gender.  Next to health
(which is assumed) it's the most important question.  But even still: why?
 Why is it the most important question?

As close as I can guess, it's because knowing the answer gives some idea of
what kind of life that infant will lead.  We live in a society [6] that
still has preconceptions based on gender [7], despite our eagerness to deny
or change it.

So I'm running a user study involving pairs of subjects who are either male
or female [8].  I'd like to communicate with them in a way that avoids
preconceptions about their partner for as long as possible [9].  I've
adopted the word "they" to mean "he or she".

Is this a good thing?  Should I stop?  Is it just bad grammar?  Most
importantly, do I conjugate it as one conjugates "they" or as one
conjugates "he" and "she"?  So many questions, so few answers.

Let's compare and contrast secular moral systems with religious ones at
this week's:

       +-                                                  -+
          girl scout benefit -+-  5:30 pm  -+- 32-G9 lounge
       +-                                                  -+

           For those coming from elsewhere: Building 32 is
            <http://whereis.mit.edu/map-jpg?selection=32>
       Once you are in 32, just take the G-elevator to the 9th
   floor and we will be in the lounge that you will be looking at
                 <http://projects.csail.mit.edu/gsb>

[1] A fake Dr., not a Ph.D.
[2] I guess usually it's "father" or "mother", but I'm being gender
neutral, here -- you'll see why in a sec.
[3] Again: fake one.
[4] I remembered it verbatim.  This is *not* a paraphrase O_o
[5] Okay, fine.  I paraphrased.  -_-
[6] Or is it a trait of the species? ...  Nah, I'll think about that later.
[7] Just like race and things.
[8] Although, not necessarily, I suppose ...
http://projects.csail.mit.edu/gsb/lgbtm.png
[9] Before I do the part where I bring them into the room and start
squishing and distorting their faces with my fingers, saying "Yes ... YES
.... You're *perfect* for my experimentssss ..." as I grin manically.