It had eaten my last quarter but it had not delivered my drink, so I
beat my fists against the coke machine.  Now my fists hurt but I still
had no drink.  It had been a very long day.  I burst into tears.

By the time the elevator had elevated me to my floor, I was just
sniffling and dabbing at my eyes with a kleenex.  My next task was to
xerox some papers, but one thought of wrestling with the gargantuan
machineries involved was too much and I resolved to put that work off
for a day.  "I'll do something simple," I thought to myself.  "I'll go
diddle the configuration of my linux box."

------ Wait a minute.  Stop the story. ------

The language authorities have just informed me that I must make
certain substitutions to correctly give credit where credit is due.
This issue is explored in depth for a specific case at
 

Here begins my self-correction and apologia:

I am informed that "coke" is not a generic noun covering all sodas;
Coca-Cola is a brand name, and that name and its derivatives such as
"Coke" should be capitalized and only used when products of that fine
company are really being referenced.  I'm sorry I misused "coke."

Similarly, "kleenex" is not a generic noun covering all facial
tissues; Kleenex is a brand name, and blah blah blah.  I'm sorry blah
blah blah.

Additionally, "xerox" is not a generic verb blah blah blah.  No,
really, I'm sorry I blah blah.

And, of course, "linux" is not a generic noun covering OS
distributions using the Linux kernel.  The entire operating system
should be referred to as GNU/Linux; this is a very important factor in
keeping people from confusing GNU/Linux with, uhm, all those
non-GNU-based Linux distributions.  I'm sor...

------ Wait a minute.  Stop the apology. ------

OK, so I admit that there's a real difference between, say, Coke and
7-Up.  And I admit that there's a real difference between some crappy
commercially-packaged Linux like RedHat and an intelligently-packaged
non-commercial one such as Debian.  

But really, I just have to reject the call to add characters when I
type, or syllables when I talk, to explicitly encode default
assumptions into my text.

I don't say "Microsoft Office," I say "Orifice."  

I don't say "the two-nostriled man over there," I say "that guy."

I don't say "Coca Cola", I say "coke."  

Hell, I don't even say "soda", 'cause that's an extra syllable over 
"coke".

And until the day MicroSoft's Linux has more mindshare than GNU's, I
just can't be bothered to type "RedHat GNU/Linux" when "RedHat Linux"
or just linux will do.

------ OK, start the story again.  ------

Ah, hell, I admit it -- I can't think of any more genericized
brand-name nouns and verbs just at the moment, and this announcement
is getting long anyhow.  So without further ado I'll put a stake in it
by encouraging you to think up more linguistic offenses at
tonight's...

****************** G I R L  S C O U T  B E N E F I T ******************
******************        5:30pm  7AI Playroom       ******************