Top 5 rejected thesis titles of the last week

[Mike Oltmans <moltmans@>]

Top 5 rejected thesis titles of the last week:

1) Massively parallel algorithms for Garbage Collecting 10 years of
   densely faceted life at MIT

2) EVE: Migration patterns of threads, data, and small furry rabbits.

3) After decades of study I can finally focus my camera!

4) When all else fails, watch them walk: Finally uncover the sexual
   identity of your UROP.

5) The KGB never achieved it, but the FBI may yet succeed: Fashion
   outlier detection for the Spring season

Can you name the corresponding Doctoral recipients?

If you are one of the proud defenders of the above research (or other 
PhD research this year) you can have one on the house at tonight's 
overly defensive:

     +-                                                 -+
       girl scout benefit -+-  5:30 pm  -+- 7ai playroom
     +-                                                 -+

Answer Key:

1) Jeremy H. Brown
Sparsely Faceted Arrays: A Mechanism Supporting Parallel Allocation,
Communication, and Garbage Collection

2) Andrew "bunnie" Huang
ADAM: A Decentralized Parallel Computer Architecture Featuring Fast 
Thread and Data Migration and a Uniform Hardware Abstraction

3) Raquel A. Romano
Projective Minimal Analysis of Camera Geometry

4) Lily Lee
Gait Analysis for Classification

5) Chris Stauffer
Perceptual Data Mining