Graduate to the World Cup

[Michael Oltmans <moltmans@>]

Stars align with planets, estranged lovers reunite, people travel across 
the globe only to meet people from across the street from their 
apartments, the US squad is ranked 5th according to the current 
FIFA/Coca-Cola World ranking system, and some people actually finish 
their PhD's and graduate.  These are just some of the reasons that you 
should be happy today.  If you just got a PhD, good for you.  If you 
just got a Master's good for you too.  If you didn't, well, maybe you 
can meet the person across the street from you in Bangkok, the 
possibilities are out there, it's a very tiny world embedded on the 
surface of a very large sphere all careening through space and time 
together.

If none of that impresses you, at least enjoy the fact that for the next 
month you can watch more soccer than you can shake a stick at.  And now 
we present the main reasons that graduating from MIT with a PhD is just 
like the World Cup:

1) You can't negotiate your salary, it's all for the glory, and 
promotional rights
2) Referees misinterpret your intentions and lash out according to their 
biases.  Complaining about it gets you nowhere.
3) You get to be on TV, whether its high def ESPN or a web simulcast, 
you're there in the spot light
4) They both usually end in a shootout
5) Quals are long and brutal and if you don't perform, you don't get to 
go on to the big dance
6) The screaming adoring fans of the opposite sex that throw their 
underwear at you
7) You get a cap for playing and have to show up in uniform
8) For the big event, you march in, everyone gets excited, you get your 
picture taken, run around in circles for a bit (often with a few boring 
interludes), everyone cheers, and you go home

And the biggest similarity of all:
9) It requires a lifetime of studying, diligence, and hard work and in 
the end only takes a month and ends in just 2 hours.

Come celebrate the world's most beautiful game and all those PhD's and 
Master's degrees by raising your glass at tonight's...

           +-                                                  -+
             girl scout benefit -+-  5:30 pm  -+- 32-G9 lounge
           +-                                                  -+

              For those coming from elsewhere: Building 32 is
               <http://whereis.mit.edu/map-jpg?selection=32>
          Once you are in 32, just take the G-elevator to the 9th
      floor and we will be in the lounge that you will be looking at
                    <http://projects.csail.mit.edu/gsb>



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